A Female Wedding Photographer Please | Emma Lowe

It always used to throw me a little when couples would tell me that finding a female wedding photographer was one of their biggest priorities.

Over the years I have worked alongside and met many incredibly talented male wedding photographers, so initially I never quite understood why it mattered so much to some couples.

As the years have gone by, I have probably heard every reason imaginable and, whilst it is not important to everyone, I have come to understand why some couples feel strongly about it.

For some, it is simply personal preference. For others, it is about comfort, communication, practicality or feeling that little bit more relaxed throughout the day.

I should reiterate I know some incredible male and female photographers, and couples that it simply does not bother once bit.

There is no right or wrong answer. Every couple is different.

Why Some People Naturally Feel More Comfortable With Women

Over the years, I have come to realise that for many couples this is not really about photography at all.

It is often about comfort, communication and familiarity.

Many people naturally associate women with listening, empathy, emotional support and reassurance. Whether those perceptions are always fair or not is another discussion entirely, but they do influence how people feel.

Weddings are highly emotional occasions. Couples are making huge decisions, managing family dynamics, dealing with nerves and often sharing very personal details about themselves, their relationships and their hopes for the day.

For some people, opening up in those conversations simply feels easier with another woman.

That does not mean female photographers are better photographers. It certainly does not mean male photographers are less caring, less professional or less capable. I know many fantastic male wedding photographers who build incredible relationships with their couples.

However, when somebody says they specifically wanted a female wedding photographer, I often find they are really talking about the way they expect that relationship to feel rather than the photography itself.

Whether that is right, wrong or somewhere in between, it is a pattern I have seen repeatedly throughout my career.

Sometimes It Is Simply Easier To Talk To Another Woman

For many weddings, particularly heterosexual weddings, it is often the bride who takes the lead when researching and planning wedding photography.

That certainly is not always the case. I have photographed weddings where the groom organised everything and plenty where the planning was a genuine 50/50 effort.

However, when one person is heavily involved in the planning, they often spend months discussing ideas, looking at photographs, building inspiration boards and imagining how they want the day to feel.

For some brides, it simply feels easier to discuss those things with another woman.

Sometimes your photographer becomes more than just your photographer. They become a sounding board, a confidant, someone to bounce ideas off and somebody who understands the vision you are trying to create.

I think for some couples that connection develops naturally with a female photographer.

Lesbian Weddings And Personal Preference

I regularly photograph lesbian weddings and, whilst many couples are perfectly happy booking male photographers, some specifically tell me they would prefer a woman. Some really don’t care.

That preference is entirely personal and completely understandable, whatever their reasons.

One practical advantage is that it often makes access to bridal preparation areas and getting ready suites feel very straightforward and relaxed.

Wedding mornings can be wonderfully chaotic. Hair, makeup, dresses, bridesmaids, family members, people constantly moving around and sometimes multiple rooms all being used at once.

As a female photographer, I often find I can move through those spaces naturally without anyone feeling self-conscious.

Again, that is not because male photographers cannot do this professionally. The vast majority are incredibly respectful and experienced. Some couples simply feel more comfortable with another woman present and that is absolutely their choice. Equally I have to often go into males areas, with a vice versa situation.

The Bridal Preparation Question

This is probably the reason I have heard most often over the years.

I have lost count of the number of times somebody has said, that they preferred having a female photographer around whilst everyone was getting ready.

Sometimes it comes from the bride.

Sometimes it comes from mums, sisters or bridesmaids.

Occasionally it even comes from the groom.

I have had grooms jokingly tell me they were much happier with me being around the bridal suite than another bloke.

Whether they were joking entirely or only half joking, I have never been completely sure.

I do think there can sometimes be a slightly protective instinct around the idea of a man being present whilst people are changing, getting dressed or preparing for the ceremony. 

Personally, I have always found this interesting because most professional wedding photographers, regardless of gender, are incredibly respectful. Male photographers are usually meticulous about announcing their arrival, knocking before entering rooms and giving people space and privacy when needed. It works perfecting well for many weddings both ways.

But weddings are not always logical environments.

They are emotional, busy and often slightly chaotic.

Sometimes couples simply choose the option that feels easiest and most comfortable for everyone involved.

What About The Grooms?

Interestingly, I rarely find grooms or groomsmen have strong opinions either way.

In my experience, most are completely relaxed whether the photographer is male or female.

I move in and out of groom preparation rooms exactly the same way I would anywhere else. A quick knock, a clear announcement and then we get on with the photography.

Perhaps that is why I have always found the difference quite interesting, because I know how professional all wedding photographers are regardless of gender.

The bridal preparations seem to generate far more discussion around the photographer’s gender than the groom preparations ever do.

Finding The Photographer You Feel Comfortable With

Personally, I think the biggest factor is simply finding somebody you click with.

I have photographed couples who specifically wanted a female wedding photographer and others who could not have cared less. Once the wedding day starts, most couples are far more interested in whether you are friendly, organised, calm and good at your job than whether you are male or female.

That said, if having a female photographer helps you feel more relaxed and comfortable, then that is a perfectly good reason too.

The more weddings I photograph, the more I realise this is not really about whether male or female photographers are better.

It is about comfort.

It is about trust.

It is about finding someone you feel relaxed around and confident will fit naturally into your wedding day.

At The End Of The Day, It Is About Feeling Comfortable

For some couples, choosing a female wedding photographer feels important.

For others, it makes no difference whatsoever.

Both viewpoints are completely valid.

My role is simply to make you feel comfortable, photograph your day naturally and create beautiful memories regardless of who you are, how your wedding looks or why you chose me in the first place.

Because the best wedding photographs come from people who feel relaxed enough to be themselves.